Is That All You See?

 I write this as I am currently away from social media, so I have no idea who will see it.  I'm currently tossing my desires back and forth when it comes to sharing my perspectives and engaging on social media.  On one hand, I do think some more "conservative" or "orthodox" LGBT voices are needed.  On the other hand, social media is something that sucks me in, and I am questioning whether it is evolutionarily healthy for me.  There might be ways to moderate and tread lightly on social media consumption, but the day for that is not today.

However,...

I still have things to say!  Of course, my mind has been wrapped up in social justice and identity politics...probably to an unhealthy level.  This is part of the balancing act.  I heard some counsel at General Conference this past weekend (April, 2022) that revolved around lowering the conflict in my heart and heeding not what the world around me may say.  And the ideologies of critical social justice certainly increase that conflict and bring me into a state of anxiety, constantly being on edge with worry.  So...I feel like I need to back away, but I also want to share my thoughts...

OK, now to my thoughts...when someone says something is "predominantly white," like a certain performing group (wink), it stings a little, especially when it's said with a certain level of hostility...like it's a bad thing.  I feel like I can fathom the desire to "see yourself" in certain groups or in various leaderships of organizations.  I can't say I even disagree with that, but it's more the how.  I feel like I should have the right do disagree on the how and not be labeled a racist.  I believe very much in equality of opportunity and in merit.  Others believe more weight should be given to race, gender, or some sort of other social identity marker.  However, diversity that isn't forced...is still diversity!  I think "representation" can still be found in merit-based systems and when skills are placed a step or two ahead of social identity markers.  There are gay people, black people, women, men, white people, brown people, transgender people...who all have different ways of approaching this blessed diversity topic...including being selected because of one of those identities.

I appreciate the natural diversity of our world.  I've appreciated it in the movies.  What I struggle with is knowing selections were made to fill some diversity quota...and especially when they have to announce such things before a movie is released!  It's taken away from some of the creativity in the arts in my opinion.  Back to my opening thought about "predominantly white."  It makes me want to respond with, "Is that all you see?  What about the sound of the music being produced?  What about the stories and backgrounds of each individual in the performing group?  What about...yes...the natural diversity in the organization because each person did what was necessary and had the skills to do it?

This leads me to something similar on the gayer side of my life.  An article was recently put out by Public Square Magazine (you can read it here) that was like a huge breath of fresh air to me.  I sometimes feel like I'm being buried by gay Pride narratives and more progressive interpretations on what it all means to be gay or transgender.  I feel like this article is at least one out of many other more gay-affirming articles, podcasts and movements that actually represents me!  We need something!!!

Part of the article discusses the weaponization of stories.  It's not uncommon to hear concerns that stories like mine will be used against others: "They can do it.  Why can't you?"  Granted, I've never actually heard this from anyone besides other LGBT people, but I don't doubt that it happens.  On either side of that weaponization...that's usually the lens through which they see stories like mine and those of other LGBT people who are striving to keep covenants and support church doctrine.  My question is the same: "Is that all you see?  Is that all my story is good for?"

I want my story to be something more than doing the basics in the gospel (which are still fundamental and very important), but...as I've said for my entire blog...I want it to also spark some thoughts about how there might be purpose behind being LGBT within a traditional view on marriage and that of gender.  What unique gifts and opportunities are there?  Are there ways that I can love deeply and intimately that also honor the law of chastity and that of marriage between a man and a woman?  

While some might be giving power and weight to church leaders and narratives that confirm their oppression as LGBT people, I suppose I have been doing some of the same things.  I look for reasons why the "LGBT Community" or the modern-day Pride excludes people like me, and I look for ways that I am already included in the gospel of Jesus Christ and in His church.  Much of this has been subconscious.  But I hope for a resurgence of "all-in" LGBT voices that I feel actually represent me.  And yes, I also value the people I have found recently who are gay and might have different views than I do on marriage and sexual morality...but who are more politically conservative or down-the-middle liberal who understand and can see a variety of perspectives.